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Drinking status | Best Drinking Quotes

Alcohol drinking status or Alcohol drinking quotes for whatsapp and facebook :-Are you Looking for Drinking Status – Drinking quotes then we must say you are on the right place. After doing lots of efforts we are finally manage to prepare the best collection on Drinking status, you surely going to love this place for sure. Also note all the below status on Drinking were free to share with your friends and love ones.

 

ATMs should have built in breathalyzers. I would save so much money.

I need a partner in wine.

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Just found a shopping list in this cart that said, “Beer, wine, crap like that”, so apparently my soulmate is still out there.

I’ve never pretended to be anything I’m not…except for sober. I’ve pretended to be sober a few times.

I like Tuesday, it rhymes with Boozeday…

I don’t care how high you set the bar as long as I can reach my drink.

Of course everyone seems sexy in a nightclub. There’s liquor and you can’t hear them.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. -Me with beer, me without beer

The only time I proof read is to see how much alcohol comes in a bottle.

Thank goodness I’m loud and obnoxious all the time, so my family can’t blame it on the alcohol.

Water is so good when it’s mixed with grains and yeast, fermented and then distilled and aged.

Sure, I’ll go to your open bar and watch you get married.

I need a vacation. or this fifth of Jack -Me at the liqiour store

I dont run from my problems, I chase them. with alcohol

A drunk man walks into a bar…but enough about me…

If you’re going to give me dirty looks for being at the liquor store at am, don’t be open.

The drunker I get, the more dance moves I know.

Of all the advice given to me over the years, “There really is no bad time for a beer” has proved to be the most helpful.

My favorite holiday spirit is poured over ice.

I put the whiskey in another room. Exercise regimen established.

I twisted my ankle playing vodka last night.. Next question

Being clean and sober means i’ve showered and am heading to the liquor store.

At my age I can no longer function without my glasses. Especially when they’re empty.

First Rule of Camping: Put up the tent before you start drinking.

You really understand how drunk you are when you’re peeing…

Sometimes you run into people who change your life forever. Bartenders, they are called bartenders.

If you put Root Beer in a square glass do you get Beer?

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Someone offered me grapes, but I declined. I’m not used to consuming wine in pill form.

I’m in a good place right now. Not emotionally….just that I’m at the liquor store.

There’s a big difference between knowing what time the liquor store closes, and what time it opens.

 

Being in the doghouse isn’t so bad if there’s enough beer in the bowl.

Look, all I’m saying is that the dinosaurs didn’t drink alcohol and look what happened to them.

You posted a drunk selfie last night at : AM and then deleted it five minutes later. But I took a screenshot. Let’s negotiate.

Instead of torturing people for getting information, why don’t they just get them really drunk?

I’M ENGAGED…..to be hungover tomorrow.

Like this if you’re “never drinking again.”

Me on New Years Eve: “I suggest we drink before we go out drinking.”

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“I can’t wait for New Years to be over!” -my liver

WHAT DO WE WANT!!! A cure for hangovers WHEN DO WE WANT IT!!! Please stop yelling

I’m not sure who’s more drunk, me or the guy wrapped in Christmas lights standing in the mirror.

Hangovers are nature’s way of grounding you as an adult.

“I’ll drink to that.” -me to my next drink

I’m celebrating  year of sobriety today. I think it was . Cheers!

A woman just dropped a  dollar bill next to me. I thought, ‘What would Jesus do?’, so I turned it into wine. Well, I bought wine.

I’m just doing what the beer tells me to.

The older I get, the more I understand someone’s desire to just say-“F*ck it. I’m going to be drunk all the time & live under this bridge.”

I simply haven’t seen enough solid evidence that suggests not drinking is better than drinking.

In case I drink too much and pass out for a while, Merry Christmas you guys.

Teens, you should not being getting drunk. You’re annoying enough as it is

Vodka and denial are cheaper than therapy.

Apparently I’m the only one that wants to drink beer at this intervention.

Why is it always “I see you drank all the beer today!” instead of, “Oh, honey, that was so sweet of you to help clean out the refrigerator.”

At long last, I’ve finished my research into the effect alcohol has on physical movement…..The results were, quite frankly, staggering.

Oh the weather outside is frightful, And this booze is damn delightful

You know you’re an alcoholic when the only Holiday cards that you get are from your neighborhood pubs.

Short Alcohol Drinking Quotes and Sayings

I recently added squats to my workouts by moving the beer into the bottom shelf of the fridge.

As a man I am so thankful I don’t have to give birth. I could never go nine months without drinking.

Drinking Tip: Never buy the first round cause that’s when people care what they’re drinking!

Do you think the dude that invented the breathalyzer has any friends left?

My favorite moment is the  minutes every day when coffee overlaps with wine.

My favorite part of Summer is the booze. Coincidentally, that’s my favorite part of the other  seasons, too.

Every loaf of bread is a tragic story of grains that could’ve become beer, but didn’t

I feel like there should be more breakfast beers on the market.

I’m sorry, I live in the U.S. so I don’t really get the metric system. How much exactly is “in moderation”?

The problem with drinking with people from work is they’re the ones I bitch about when I’m drunk.

I’m pretty sober, but I’m prettier drunk.

Gluten free. Dairy free. Fat Free. I love the wine diet!

You know you are old when your parties have glasses instead of red plastic cups.

I always scratch off the “Plus One” option on wedding invitations are replace it with “Drinking for two”

They don’t make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery.

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If I ever sound inspriational, one of us is drunk.

drink beer ? save water

“You drive me to drink!!!” ~Me shouting to the taxi driver.

You know you’re getting old when you have to have a drink to motivate you to go out & have a drink.

If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, you’re drunk. Ducks don’t talk.

Whenever I have a panic attack, I put a brown paper bag over my mouth. and drink all the vodka inside. It seems to help

Nice try salad bars, there’s only one kinda bar I plan on attending.

My relationship with whiskey has been on the rocks lately

I am a drinker. Hear me pour

I don’t drink water, unless it’s been through a brewery first.

You say mystery bruise, I say drinking badge of honor.

What I lack in sex appeal I make up in staying home and drinking.

I don’t need a reason to enjoy a little wine. All I need is a glass.

I never cry over spilt milk. But, beer? That sh!t’s totally different.

At what number beer are you offically not working from home anymore?

I will always be here for you. Unless we run out of beer and someone has some over there. Then I will be over there for you.

If anyone asks, I’m drinking all this wine to collect corks for a pinterest project.

Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I’ve ever made.